Wednesday, August 3, 2011

A Blowjob That Hurt

While still exploring our new sexual sides, me and Mike have taken a bit of a break compared to the fast pace we originally set in regards to bringing people into our sex life.  He recently started his own blog, and we both realized that while new people are fun, neither of us are the type that enjoys random stranger sex.  I like being able to have conversations with with I fuck.  I still suck and fuck Tristan and Dave pretty regularly, but I'm waiting on looking for anything else until we find a nice piece of pussy for Mike to enjoy.

So we're branching out onto the dating websites like OkCupid looking for compatible sex partners since it's free and we both like the idea of friends with benefits.

I will start posting our success and failures as soon as I deem them worthy, and until then I thought it would be fun to share a couple really epic sex injury stories - but only one today.

Longest Blowjob of My Life:  (originally told to Maxwell)


Ok, so about 4 years ago I had a blowjob buddy that lived about 40 minutes away from myself.  I'll call him Mr. Valium(explanation incoming).  The way we worked is every few days, or at least once a week, I would drive all the way to his house with an 18-pack in hand.  We would chat, hang out, maybe play a little guitar hero until eventually I got on my knees and gave him a great blowjob.  He would smile, I would thank him, and then I'd leave.

One night when I got there, however, he had just seen a doctor for back pain and was heavily medicated on Valium.  It didn't seem like a big deal at the time and neither one of us thought it was a big deal for him to be drinking while so medicated.

...It wasn't until about thirty minutes into the blowjob, a little while later, that it occurred to me that beer and Valium might not be the best mix for someone wanting to get their cock sucked...

Of course this thought just made me more determined to give him an amazing blowjob and get him off, he was enjoying it, and I figured it would just feel that much better for him when he finally did cum.  So I kept blowing  away.

Keep in mind that I was pretty smashed at the time and wasn't very aware of pain or discomfort, I couldn't even feel my knees.  After an hour of working his cock over I did notice that my knees were really red and starting to bleed.  So I wisely decided I needed some cushioning and took a five minute breather to get myself comfortable again and down a couple more beers before going back down to keep blowing and sucking my way into the drunken blowjob hall of fame.

Luckily, about the time I was starting to sober up.. pain was intruding ever so slightly upon my awareness.. when I finally have the bright idea to make him do some work and fuck my face to get himself off.  At this point the blowjob had lasted for two whole fucking hours, and it only took him two more minutes to cum once he started fucking my pretty little mouth.

After dragging myself home I decided never to suck cock for that long, when I'm that drunk, ever again.  The insides of my lips were bleeding since I had rubbed them raw on my teeth.  I couldn't shut my mouth for hours afterwards because of the intense lockjaw.  My face hurt for a week.  I had intense hand cramps for a few days and my knees looked like pulverized slabs of meat.

Considering the fact that not only was I the only one to ever drive to his place or pay for beer.. Mr. Valium never offered to pay or do anything.. I would say this is a pretty embarrassing story about what a stupid brand-new 21 year old I was.  Now I at least make them buy me one beer.  Unless they're too hot to pass up.

6 comments:

  1. I need one of you in my life. Drive to my place, play video games, bring beer, blow me, then leave? If you made sandwiches, you would be the definition of perfection in a woman.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Of course I make sandwiches.. me and Mr. Valium simply never hung out long enough or early enough in the night to require sustenance.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I too have done stupid things like this for a guy! I once paid for a nice hotel room and all the 'bits and bobs' needed for the evening, gave this guy anything he wanted and all I got in return was him laying on the bed watching TV for hours and talking to another girl on the phone...waiting for me to leave so she could join him in the room I paid for!

    You deserve a pat on the back for two whole hours tho!

    ReplyDelete
  4. holy shit... 2 hours... Damn. Next time you're faced with that situation, milk the prostate... lol

    ReplyDelete
  5. just hope you come to uk for a holdiay one day xxx

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Soph - Yeah.. I would have kicked that guy outta the hotel room, seriously!

    @Lawless - I would have milked the prostate if he wasn't such a prude.. chances are he didn't know much about hygiene anyway!

    @Jennyuwhen - If I ever make it over to the UK i'll be sure to let you know darlin' ;)

    ReplyDelete